ALAMOSA — Since she was 8 years old, local author Patricia Eagle has had dogs in her life.  Although different, each dog has had a profound and lasting impact. 

But it wasn’t until she and her late husband, Bill, had just finished the multi-week, arduous task of building a small dog cemetery on property they own that the inspiration to write a book came to her. 

“We sat there one night with our glasses of wine, looking at what we’d built and sharing stories about our dogs that I thought I’m going to write a book about this. I feel like I’m a better dog companion for having had all these dogs and…there it went.” 

She also says that her dogs have made her a better human, something she’s “been aware of for her lifetime.” Eagle is a survivor of sexual abuse, which she wrote about in her first book “Memoir of Sexual Abuse and Survival”. 

“My first dog taught me about love and companionship and trust,” she says. “Because of my early experiences, I’ve had challenges with keeping mental health balance in my life. There are things you don’t just get through. You carry them with you, like I’m discovering right now with the death of my husband last year. It’s not something that ‘boom! I’m over it.’ The same with my childhood trauma. 

“But my dogs… The stories are what I’ve learned from them and Bill learned from them, too. He wasn’t a dog person but became one through my big love for dogs.  

“Hands down, my dogs taught me to be a better person. They taught me to trust. They taught me to slow down and to listen. They taught me to not assume that I have all the power and always know better in every situation.” She then quickly adds with a laugh, “I do know better in a lot of situations, like when it comes to dog care. But I’m just humbled by what my dogs have taught me.” 

When asked if there was one dog in her past who stands out, Eagle immediately thinks of Gavroche, her seventh dog and one of the five dogs she adopted from a shelter. 

Named for a character in Victor Hugo’s novel “Les Misérables”, Gavroche was much like the “little street urchin” who was his namesake. A brown, short-haired terrier mix “with maybe a little bit of chihuahua”, he had been picked up “running the streets” and brought to a shelter where, although only 2 years old, he quickly garnered a reputation as a biter.  

“He bit more people at the shelter than any dog had before and he bit me, too,” Eagle says, with a laugh, “but I kept him. I realized we both had trust issues, and we had to learn to trust each other. He got me to listen and to change my expectations of a dog and to understand what would help him be tamer and to calm down. Within a year, he and I began to relate well, and he turned into the most incredible little guy. His good-guy flags were flying.”  

Gavroche could never completely lose his automatic reaction of biting in certain situations, like when he was surprised by something or when she swatted at him to get away from her tomato plants and he nipped her hand. “But after that, all day long, he kept showing me he was so sorry.”  

As Eagle describes it, Gavroche also helped her see her own reactive nature, as well. “That was one of the biggest lessons right there. I also learned from him how to help him feel safe and to be aware of those feelings in myself.” 

Each of her dogs has taught her a different lesson, she says, including her second dog who taught her a painful but valuable lesson. 

“I was in college when my second dog plopped in my life. I was not very responsible and had to give that dog away. I was a risk taker, due to things from my childhood, and when I came back from a wild and reckless trip, I saw that, even though I loved her so much, I had to give her to a good friend who took really good care of her. That’s when I learned I don’t ever want to do that again.”  

Gavroche, who “had a long and happy life”, lived until he was 17 years old when Eagle and her husband, Bill, had to put him to sleep.  

“That’s another big lesson I learned over all the years of having those dogs in my life. As some of my dogs became significantly ill – one who was hit by a car – I had to put them to sleep. They were quite old and had cancer. One dog had had a stroke. 

“That was a lesson I had to keep repeating, including the wisdom to listen when my dogs told me. I didn’t want to do it. I wasn’t ready. But when one of my dogs who had a brain tumor went outside in 10-degree weather and refused to come inside, I knew that’s what he was telling me.  

“We don’t want to listen because it’s so hard. It’s so hard. Dogs have shorter life spans than we do. That necessitates loss, and learning how to deal with the grief. I still grieve for every dog. But experiencing loss and death with my dogs has helped me deal with the loss of Bill. It’s not the same, but it’s helping. 

“I’ve learned to weep and to weep and to feel that immense loss when my floors don’t creak, or I don’t hear my dog's nails on the floor. I’ve learned grief is part of healing. And all of my dogs have taught me that I can carry this.” 

It also helped her to understand when Bill chose Medical Assistance in Dying.  

“I had learned to put his needs ahead of mine, even when I thought I couldn’t bear the loss. He told me he wanted to have the same beautiful death as the dogs, surrounded by people who love him. And that’s what we did. 

“So, yes, my dogs taught me about living. And they’ve taught me about dying. And those are some of the most important lessons in life.” 

Eagle will be at the Narrow Gauge Book Cooperative on March 21, 6 p.m., where she’ll be giving a book talk and book signing. Narrow Gauge is located on the southwest corner of State Avenue and Main Street in Alamosa.